Feedback for Growth, Part 1

Push or Pull?

I recently dropped an earring behind my dresser. Naturally, I pulled the dresser out to reach back and grab the earring. The trouble came when I attempted to push the dresser across the carpet back into place. I learned it is easier to pull something out of a corner rather than push something into one. Apparently I’m a little late to this realization, but the ultimate goal remains to continuously learn, is it not?

Just in time feedback

I was recently out with a college friend who presently leads a team of people who, in turn, lead additional teams of people in the corporate world. I’ve known Tashi for nearly 15 years. As a friend she can be rather blunt and if you are sensitive, she can come off as abrasive. Over the years she has taught me a lot about being sure of myself, so sure that I can stand in a doorway with her and she can say “Rice, you’ve got lots of gray hair” and not take offense. What’s interesting is how she has effectively grown into a leader who leads by pulling rather than pushing people. I’d argue that the simple measures Tashi has taken, can be applicable to many areas of leadership including education and even in the classroom.

Tashi provides regular feedback through weekly check-ins. Feedback, whether you are in business, education, management or on the front line, functions the same. People need feedback to improve. It also provides, as a leader, your opportunity to ensure excellence among your team. I'd argue, that this feedback must be timely and actionable. Telling a basketball player he is too short is not an actionable piece of feedback. Asking the player to improve his vertical and speed is actionable.

Timely Feedback

Waiting 10 days after you see a disappointing moment in your employee will not work. It sends a message, “I don’t care that much”.  Suppose every day a student is sleeping in class. If you don’t address it for weeks, what message does that send to the student? Even worse, when a struggling student does not get feedback to improve her ability to solve quadratic equations, how is she going to feel on the day of the test? What message are we sending these children (or adults) if we are not giving them feedback to improve in a timely, actionable manner?

Adults that have a supervisor who is willing to build their capacity, coach and teach them, will step up to the plate and accomplish great things. Adults who are ignored will feel disgruntled, uninterested, and taken aback when they are suddenly reprimanded for being imperfect at the end of a sales quarter,  for instance, when it is too late to improve. Feedback must be timely and actionable.

But not too timely

Conversely, feedback that is too quick to be given can be detrimental to growth. My first few years of teaching I worked at Ann Taylor selling clothes. One of the managers would talk to me after every interaction with a client giving me feedback and telling me what to do differently. There was never an opportunity for me to be self-reflective and learn from my interactions without her telling me what to do. The general manager of the store was quite different. She would observe multiple interactions with clients and reflect back to me what she saw. I was able to grow as a sales associate with her coaching because I felt efficacy and as if my improvement mattered and was possible.  This same structure is brought into the TRX classes that I teach. If I am constantly correcting each flaw a person makes during the 60 minute workout, it might send the signal to the client that they aren’t cut out for TRX. But again if I don’t give them feedback when they are holding their straps wrong, or over-using their backs for the workout, I appear to be indifferent to their growth. It is a fine balance of feedback and letting people self-correct. 

Small Business Revolution

We should do the same as educators. Do we jump in when a student makes a mistake, or do we watch, let them struggle and see if they can find their mistake and correct it on their own? Or maybe we are a leader of a school, do we quickly discount a teacher's ability based on how they speak up at a meeting with a dissenting opinion? Or do we ask more questions to understand, and get them to reflect on what they are saying? As leaders, do we work to learn from those around us or do we constantly correct those in our charge leaving them to feel incompetent?  The choice is ours.

No matter if you are teacher, principal or lead in the corporate world.  Timely, actionable feedback is essential.  But what are other ways to pull rather than push people to greatness?  I hope to explore this more in my next post on feedback.