Why this teacher has considered leaving the profession

When I can look around with gratitude at all the students doing math in my classroom I know I am exactly where I need to be.

Then there are times when the kids aren't around and I wonder what am I doing here?  Does this make me happy?   Is it all worth it?  Can I function in this environment for another year, another month, another day?

When we consider why good, great and even mediocre teachers leave the profession what the data reveals doesn't surprise me.  It's exactly the reasons I've considered leaving the profession. 

It isn't pay. None of us went into this profession looking to make lots of money. (29% of the teacher surveyed said pay was one of the factors they left)

It isn't the students.  Teenagers are weird, exhausting, wonderful, creative, sad, lovely people.  I adore them and all the complexities they bring to the table day in and out. (What percent?)

It isn't what teaching is.  It's what it isn't.

It hasn't been a place where teachers are considered professionals.  Look at the conversations around school board nominees in the last election.  I read countless posts on social media where people expressed their belief that teachers shouldn't be on a school board. One poster even stated that not having kids should make you less effective at being on a school board even if you are a teacher?  In what other profession do we not want the professionals at the table making the decisions?  A medical board should not be filled with just business people and patients.  It needs to include (and should primarily consist of) the professionals on the ground doing the work and seeing where there are issues.

Unfortunately good teachers learn to hunker down in their classrooms and focus on what they can control. They spend their energy on their group of students and ignore the rest. These good teachers are capable of doing so much more.  They can help build equitable schools, districts and communities.  They witness first hand the negative impact policies have on their students and are creative in thinking up solutions. 

Here's the irony.  This post (above) was drafted in November 2019.  We now find ourselves in the midst of the most challenging times in school planning, how to reopen schools during a global pandemic. And guess who is not at the table?  The teachers.  

Hunkering down in our classrooms isn't an option. Our health and the health of our students is on the line.  A committee of 20 with only 4 teachers just isn't adequate.  Conversations that talk about how to schedule our students with out looking at how to keep people safe first is completely backwards.  Typically when there is a policy that we don't agree with, we can make it work and work within the policy.  We can't do that now.  We can't hunker down in our classrooms and focus on what we can control without feeling like we are risking our lives. 

In normal times, teachers don't feel valued.  Right now, August 1st, 2020, it's especially hard to feel valued.